Day two really is the second day.

So, in order for this to work I have to write everyday; used to be that I did. Then, like so many other things in my life I got bored, detached, and eventually just gave into the inevitable truth that that no one was listening in the first place. But now, since my husband and I have begun living in different states (he in graduate school, I still in undergrad) I need a place to bitch. Bitch, of coarse, isn't the correct sentiment. But after the week I've had it's the best that I can do. I assume that he's going to read this blog, he might possibly be the only one who does.
Hi Spike, btw.
I restarted blogging, not because I care if anyone will read. But because there are so many things that I want to say, when people ask how things have been. I just can't get my words out, I have awful blanks spells. I get dragged down into dark voids of "like" and "um" without a guiding synonym in sight to dispell the darkness. Maybe by writing again, and keeping thoughts closer to the surface I won't sound so bored anymore.
Or it could be that I'll just discover that I'm not bored, but instead just boring.
The days are just going to wash over me in the next months, I know it. I have that awful feeling of forgetful and medicated. What can I do though? I just have to get through this semester, graduate, and await the panic that sets in when I can't find a job. Then, after the grace period ends, I will begin the age old question of "Can I afford to eat if I plan on paying my federal aid bills at the end of the month?"
Don't worry though, dear reader, I'll make the right decision. After all, bread will always be in the grocery store but you're only allowed ten years to pay back the Federal Government.
...
Sorry for the bitterness, I just found out today how much I actually owe in loans. The end result, will justify the means but it's still I a bigger number than I had estimated.
But what do I know? I'm terrible at math and have a severe case of kidding myself.

(picnic, lightning)

I have a headache. It's taken residence behind my eyes, and seems to come to call only when I'm in desperate need of sleep. So instead of sleeping, which would most likely make this stubborn guest leave, I have pain that keeps me from doing so. It always seems to prefer the left side over the right, could it be that i have possibly pulled a muscle in that hemisphere? The harder I think about it, the more the pain flares...so I would say it is definetly a possibility. The revalation that thinking too much gives you pain is not one that I hope would happen in my last semester of college, with 17 credits in tow.
Oh what a world.